Christmas 2009

Merry Christmas!!!

Before I start telling you about our Christmas I have to tell you about our Christmas eve. It was typical, for the most part. We just hung around the house. After dinner we baked cookies for Santa and then snuggled in to watch a Christmas show we had DVR'd. (DVRd? DVRed? Recorded on our Digital Recording Device?) Anyways, we were sitting on the couch in the living room when we hear someone yelling out front. I figured it was the idiots next door or something. Larry got up and looked out the window. When he comes back he says "There are cops outside with assault rifles."

What!?! So of course I have to take a look. And sure enough, there are cops EVERYWHERE around our house. Like 10 cop cars and cops all over the place. Two cops were taking cover behind our van, one had an assault rifle drawn and he was the one who was yelling directions at someone I couldn't see. So I went upstairs to get a better look. By the time I got up there they had cuffed the guy and had him sitting on the electrical box in our side yard. His shirt was all torn off, it was a Tshirt and all that remained of it was the collar. Maybe one sleeve was left, I can't remember exactly.

When I get back downstairs Larry is on the phone with someone. I assume it to be his mom and I'm wondering if we are on the news. Is this the end of a high speed chase or something? But it turns out to be our neighbor from across the street calling to see if we are ok and if we know anything. We don't.

So, who in our neighborhood could have caused such a ruckus? Was it the idiots? Nope. Was it the dish guy? Nope. It was a perfectly nice family who has several perfectly nice boys, two of which come to our bus stop and never give me a lick of trouble. Weird. I can't wait to find out the story. I do know the cops have been over to their house several times before but I didn't think anything of it. I mean, I've had the cops at my house plenty recently and we aren't suspicious.

But anyways... with drama over we moved on with the business of Christmas. Last year I made a list of everything I got and I was surprised how long it was once it was all laid out. So I said I was going to do that every year from then on... so here we go, in no particular order.

The Body Bugg (Google it)
4 necklaces
Pajamas
Dexter seasons 2 and 3
The Christmas Sweater by Glenn Beck
Would You Rather board game
Calendar
Kitchen Radio
Homemade Ice Cream Maker
Desperate Housewives season 5
A little organizer set with to do lists and post it's and what-not
Big post its and pens
CD with Christmas songs
Earrings
Costco Gift Card
Blue Ray Player (shared with Larry)

Pretty cool. What did you get?

Polar Express

Yesterday, we got home from our trip to the North Pole. It was so fun. The train leaves from Williams, up near the Grand Canyon. I was hoping it would snow big fat flakes that stick to everything and make good snowballs. I got my wish.

It's a three hour drive from our house to the hotel. We had driven for 2 hours and 50 minutes when we hit a wall of blizzard. It took almost 2 hours to drive the last 9.5 miles. That's 5 miles an hour for those of you who are doing the math. It was total white out. Couldn't even see the trees on the sides of the road. It was crazy. We had left early so even with the two hour delay we had plenty of time to settle in before our train ride.

The hotel had a big fire and cozy couches set up. Big windows looked out over what is probably the lawn in the summer time... but it had been transformed into a winter wonderland. Christmas lights everywhere and all the trees were weighted down under the fresh snow. Someone had just finished a snowman that had a carrot nose and tomatoes for eyes. It was awesome.

They closed all the roads not long after we arrived so we felt pretty lucky to have gotten in. We were snowed in! I was loving it. The train left right from the hotel so we didn't have to drive anywhere. We just played in the snow and warmed up by the fire.

The train ride itself was really cool. They served hot chocolate and cookies made by Mrs. Clause herself. When we got to the North Pole Santa came on board and gave all the kids a bell. Then on the way back to the hotel we sang Christmas songs. It was so fun. The kids loved it.

It just kept right on snowing the whole time we were there. The news was saying that Williams got 15 inches while we were there. But the roads were open when we got up and by the time we were getting on the road the sun was out and the roads were fine.

Perfect.

4

4 days til Christmas!!!

Our tree looks awesome. We actually did it this year and didn't go CRAZY with the gifts. We always say we will get the kids fewer, but more expensive, gifts. You know... one $50 dollar gift rather than 5 $10 gifts. But I always start to get the thought that they won't have enough presents to open. That Christmas is more fun when you have more gifts. Is that true? I don't know, but every year I'm a little stunned at the sheer number of presents under the tree. And then when I add the Santa gifts and it's just plain ridiculous.

This year we did much better. Two things helped me keep it under control. First I kept a written list of what we were planning on getting each kid. Seeing it all laid out in one place helped see what they really have. And secondly I wrapped everything right away. That helped keep a visual of how many presents were really under the tree. No back of the closet surprises this year.

Worms

Today I dug a bag of worms out of the trash and kept it in my kitchen for several hours. On purpose. Why?

It started last night. We went out to get pizza last night and as we were waiting for the food to arrive Maddy mentioned that she has worms in her backpack.

Apparently they "grew" worms in dirt at school. She assured us that it's ok because they are in a zip lock bag.

"But you can't leave live animals in a plastic bag, they will die."
"I poked holes in it."
"But the worms could crawl out through the holes."
"No, the holes are at the top."
"But I'm sure your backpack is laying any ole' which way right now. And probably went in every direction on the way home from school."

So worms in her backpack in an unknown state.

When I got up this morning there was a brown paper bag with "Madison's worms" written on it with black marker. A peek inside revealed a ziplock bag (with holes poked in it at the top) filled with dirt and, I assumed, a worm or two. I told her that if she wants to set the worms free she better do it.

But after I came in from putting her on the bus I found the bag still sitting on the counter. So I just took the whole thing and put it in the trash.

But by lunch I was actually feeling bad. She is sentimental and if she thinks I killed her worms she will probably be upset. I took the bag out of the trash and put it back on the counter so she could "set them free" when she got home for school.

Cause that's the kind of mom I am.

Take a drink everytime I say "resolution"

It's getting to that time of year again. New Year's Resolution time!

First lets take a look back at last year's resolutions and see we did.

My 2009 resolutions were:
1. To be more stylish (not measurable, but I would say met.)
2. To make $5,000 through diversifying my income (met)
3. Paint a room (met)

I did a mid year review of my resolutions back in June. I'm pretty much is the same boat as I was then except that I painted Connor's room over Thanksgiving weekend. In June I had only painted the office, and I really didn't feel like that counted. But now I have an actual room in the house painted. So met. I'm very proud to have met all of last year's resolutions.

So looking ahead to the end of 2010. Connor will be almost 5. Maddy will be 9 and in 3rd grade. Wow and wow.

My 2010 resolutions are:
1. Get my associates degree: I'm on track for this. 4 more classes at two classes per semester = one year.
2. Pay off non mortgage debt and not take on any new debt: This should happen if everything goes to plan. I think the not taking on new debt will be the hardest part.
3. Get my hair done at least 3 times: Yes, 3 times a YEAR. What can I say? I'm not a typical girl.
4. Do something together as a family at least once a month: I know this is kinda sad to have to plan this. But it's actually hard since Maddy is gone for half the weekends. And by something I mean like, go to the movies, or play a game. Something where we are all having the same experience at the same time. Ha, easier said than done! Our excuse in the past has always been that Connor is too little. But we can't really use that one anymore since he's going to be 4 in like 6 weeks.

I tried to make them more measurable than last years. #4 is the first time I've made a resolution that requires a monthly action. So we'll see how that goes. I want to keep up my winning streak, so I'll do my best.

Done!

The semester is officially over!! Wohoo. I took my final today and with that the semester came to a close. This semester was the craziest so far and there were times I really didn't think I was going to make it though. But here we are... across the finish line. Phew!

So I haven't posted in a while and I'm sorry. But I'm excited to get back to it cause I've missed regular posting. I think of things I want to tell you about and then by the time I actually get to sit down for a second 10 other things have happened and yet I can't think of one thing to say other than complain about the speed of life.

But here are a few things that I wanted to say... real quick and then we will be up to speed.

On Thanksgiving I painted Connor's room. It was a little sad at first, but I LOVE it now. It was the right choice. I spend a few minutes mourning the loss of the nursery paint, but now it looks like a real, put together, little boys room. I realize now that his room looked kinda like Uncle Jesse's room from Full House. The rocker guy in the room with pink bunnies. Everything about Connor's room was little boy except this babyish paint. You can't really tell from the pic but it's Patriots colors. (I feel like I've already mentioned this... see I'm totally going crazy... but either way, I know I didn't post pics.)

The other thing I wanted to tell you is that we went to see the Imagination Movers a few weeks ago. So fun. I was actually surprised at how good the show was. If you dont' know who they are... and unless you have a Disney obsessed preschooler you probably don't... the Imagination Movers are a kid's band that has a show on Disney. They live in the Idea Warehouse and solve "idea emergencies". Its a cute show, but it's a kids show and while I knew Connor would love to see them live, I wasn't personally looking forward to it. (Other than getting to be outside at night, which is a whole other post.) I described them to a friend as "the new Wiggles". But I was wrong... oh so wrong. To call them the new Wiggles is an insult. Because unlike the Wiggles, the Imagination Movers actually have musical talent. It was a good time.

Ok, that's it.

Lost

The other day Larry stayed home from work. I asked him to take Connor to go get his hair cut while I went and ran some other errands.

I went to Walmart. It felt very strange to be out without kids. Larry off with Connor and me all by myself. I was surprised how quickly I was able to get stuff done. Crazy. So I walk out of Walmart in record time and I realize I don't know where I parked. I went down an aisle that seemed like where I parked but I didn't see the van. I try to think back to when I pulled in. I remembered that I didn't come in my regular entrance to the parking lot. I remembered that I parked pretty close because I was surprised how not busy Walmart was.

I saw a van that kinda looked like mine parked a few rows over. I go over there and it's not it. The spaces are slanted and I remember parking in a space facing the store and on the right of the row.

Ok, so that narrows it down. Only half the rows slant towards the store, and I know I parked on the right, and only 3 or 4 spaces in. That leaves maybe 10 total spaces in the whole parking lot that I could have parked in. So I decided to just walk the whole lenght of the parking lot and I HAVE to find it, right. So I start walking. After about 3 rows I get to where I really think I parked. I'm just sure I parked right THERE! But the van is not there. Instead there is a car that, actually... now that I'm looking at it... looks just like Larry's car.

Duh... Larry's car.

I'm an idiot.

What boy?

I'm painting Connor's room. We decided to do it in the Patriots colors. I think it's going to come out really cute. I'll post pics when I'm done with it. I started it yesterday before we went to Steve's for Thanksgiving. (Happy Thanksgiving, by the way!) I figured it was as good a day as any since Larry was home and Connor wasn't going to get a nap anyways.

The plan was to air out the house while we were gone to Thanksgiving dinner and he could sleep in there last night. But when we got home it was still really stinky in his room and I felt bad that he had to sleep in there. Plus I didn't want to put his room back together only to have to take everything out again in the morning. So since Maddy was at Shaun's I got the grand idea to have Connor sleep in Maddy's bed. I didn't think it would go over, but it did. He did really great. I was surprised.

I've told you before how he can weird me out when we are in his room. (click here for that)
He came in this morning and climbed in bed with us.

"Did you have a good sleep in Maddy's room?"
"Yep. But the people were bleeding."
"Huh?"
"The boy was bleeding."
"The boy was bleeding?"
"Yeah, the boy in Maddy's closet has boo boos."

Gulp!

Seriously, what the heck? He didn't seem freaked out so we didn't ask any further. But my goodness, how creepy!

So close!

If you and I have ever talked about children sleeping then you know that Connor was a terrible sleeper as a baby. I didn't have this blog back then, which is just as well since every entry would have been titled "I'm exhausted!", so I can't go back and link to a very long post detailing all the intricacies of getting Connor to lay in his bed asleep. It was a feat, let me tell you. I would spend 45 minutes of the most precise movements to get him to lay down for a nap. And when that was done, I would sit in the chair in his room and wait. I knew that he would be up in about 15 minutes. There wasn't even a chance to go downstairs.

The only thing that got me through that time was knowing it would just be a little while longer. Just a few more months and he will start sleeping through the night. Don't lose it now! You can do it. This won't last forever. Thankfully, I didn't know the truth!

Don't get me wrong, there have been periods of time when he has slept through the night. I just didn't think I would still be having this conversation with myself. We've been through teething, we've made it through leaky diapers, we've found every lost pacifier, and we even survived the perfectly smooth blanket obsession. However, I really do think we are currently working on the last hurdle. Going to the bathroom alone!

I've been talking up the "big boy-ness" of going potty all by himself. I finally got him to agree, at least in theory. So then we worked out the lighting, hall light on. He knows what to do, we've been over it a couple of dozen times. Tonight was the first real trial. He called me up there at about 9:30. "Mommy!! I have to go paaaaaaaaaay!"

Now I don't think we are the only parents in the world who break out the good snacks AFTER the kids go to bed. They get a couple of pieces of Halloween candy, and we get to take huge spoonfuls of raw cookie dough into the living room. You know the drill. Anyways, so there I was cookie dough in mouth as I went up stairs to encourage my 3.5 year old son to go to the bathroom by himself. I told him I would wait in his room and he can go potty alone. He told me he knows how.

"You get out of bed." Hops out of bed.
"You walk to the bathroom." Walks like a robot out of the room.
He probably had commentary in the bathroom but I couldn't hear.
"And then you go back to sleep!" Hops back into bed and lays down.

I told him what a good job he did and leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"What's that smell?!"
"huh?" I swear that boy just smelled cookie on my breath!
"It smells like...." Please don't say cookies. Please don't say cookies. "muffins."
"mmm"

So the good news is that our secret midnight desserts are still safe. The bad news is that I have just a little while longer until I can sleep through the night. Right?

Planet 51

Larry had to work Friday night. I was planning on bringing Maddy over to Shaun's but he called at about 2:00 and ruined all my plans with news that his son might have Swine Flu. And since I don't feel like spending Thanksgiving in the hospital with my asthmatic daughter and her Swine Flu I decided to keep her home.

Which left me with visions of serious cabin fever and two stir crazy kids. So I decided to take them to the movies. As luck would have it, Planet 51 was showing at the most perfect time. 4:45.

I got Maddy off the bus at 3:40 and by the time we were unpacked and settled in it was time to go. I'm so out of touch, I was surprised that the movies were busy on a Friday night. Dur. Hey, what do you want? When was the last time I was at the movies at night(ish)? Sometime in 2005 I bet. Anyways, I walk up to the ticket window:

Me: "Hi, 2 kids and 1 adult for Planet 51, please."
Ticket Guy: "For 3:35?"
Me: looking at my watch in a confused fashion "No, 4:45"
Ticket Guy: "$xx.xx" (I don't remember the price.)
Ticket Guy: being confused and pressing buttons "What did you want again?"
Me: "2 kids and 1 adult" Thinking this was obvious since here I stand, one adult, with my two kids.
Ticket Guy: "Oh I gave you 2 adults and 1 kid, you can get a refund inside.... if you want."
Me: "I want."

Which wasn't a big deal, I went inside and they gave me back my $1.50. But as I will find out later the new kid's ticket was for the 3:45 movie.

We got our dinner... er, popcorn. And headed down to theater 10 as I was told to by ticket taker man.

Pause:
There has to be a better design to movie theaters than the one they currently have. First you talk to a person with a microphone through bullet proof glass. Then you go inside and have your ticket ripped in half and be told what theater your movie is in. This seems kinda ridiculous. I have an issue having to talk to people on microphones. I don't think that is the best way to treat your customer. And the bullet proof glass? Not necessary. I mean, banks don't even use that anymore. And just because they are outside is no excuse. There are lots of places that take your money outside and don't feel the need to protect themselves behind 2 inches of plexi-glass. I would think some kind of set up like they have at the zoo would be better. Little booths where you talk to a real person, face to face, pay and then you go inside.

Play:
So I'm carrying my 115 oz drink, purse, sweater, 2 gallons of popcorn, two cardboard trays so the kids can have their own popcorn, AND trying to hold Connor's hand. I make our way to theater 10. We start to go in and the movie is already playing. Now, I KNOW we are not late. So I loudly and disruptively back everyone out of the theater and find a bench to put down all my stuff. I dig my ticket stubs out of my pocket and see that one ticket says theater 10, but the other two say theater 7. Ah. Ok, load back up and drag the kids over to theater 7. Phew!

The movie was ok. Only two bathroom breaks, which is fine. The story line wasn't all that. I could have written it myself. In fact it very much reminded me of the movie Space Chimps, if you've had the benefit of that fine film. I did have a full fledged panic attack half way through where I checked the time every 15 seconds for about 10 minutes. But other than that, it went really well.

By the time we got home it was practically time for bed. So that was perfect. I gave the kids a sandwhich because I think they were suffering from "popcorn tummy" (and you know what I'm talking about if you've ever had popcorn for dinner). Then off to bed!

The movies: a perfect way to kill an evening without actually having to spend time together.

quick update

Nothing really going on over here. Same ole'. Same ole'. Maddy went to the zoo today with the Girl Scouts. So cute. She's getting so big. Her troop leader is a trip. She's just enough scatter brained to be fun, and just enough organized to get it all done. I don't know how she does it. My head would explode. Just going to pick Maddy up at the end of her meeting is enough to give me a panic attack.

I only have another month of school. I'm really hoping things calm down after this semester is over. I'm still taking two classes next semester but I won't be going 4 days a week. Just two. So I think that schedule will be less chaotic. Hey, positive thinking is what motivates me to sign up for this torture every six months.

We got our new sleep number bed this weekend. Aw yeah. I've only slept on it once so far, but I think it's going to be good. I was way to excited. I know no one else cares that I got a new bed. But I couldn't contain myself. I love to sleep. It was almost more exciting than getting a new car. I think I was more excited than when I got the van. lol.. that's just wrong.

The corn jungle

We had a very Halloweenish weekend. On Friday after lunch Connor and I went to the a little roadside pumpkin patch. We picked out some pumpkins but when we got up to the front to pay I found out they only took cash. So Boo. We had to leave without our pumpkins. I never carry cash. Then later that night Larry and Maddy went to a costume Father-daughter dance. Totally cute. I didn't have a costume for Maddy so I improvised and she went as Dorthy from the Wizard of Oz. She wore the same dress she wore to my brother in law's wedding, which means I have now gotten 3 uses out of that dress. It's a blue and white plaid and we got her little basket that she carried a stuffed little dog in. It was pretty cute. They had a good time. Larry was a pirate.

Then on Saturday we went to the farmer's market down the street. They have a cornmaze, or a corn jungle as Connor calls it. That was fun. Connor really liked it. They also had a barrel train and a bounce house. They had animals too but not a petting zoo. Which I was happy about. You could reach through the fence and pet them if you really had to do that. Connor pet a pig. We ended our day at the farmers market and got some pumpkins and desert honey. Mmmmm.

Hot dogs

Today I skipped my first class so that I could go to the library and work on my Math homework. I worked for about a half hour and realized I had some major questions. So I decided to sit in on the class before mine. I knew we were going over the homework and I figured two sessions in a row would probably do the trick.

Pause that story, while I talk about the hot dog guy....

There's a guy at my school who sells hot dogs from a little cart. That's a killer gig, I would assume. I've only seen him a couple of times because he parks near the library and I don't usually go that way. The first time I saw him was a couple of weeks ago and as I walked by I overheard a conversation he was having with a student. I don't remember the whole thing but I left with the distinct impression that the guy was the owner of the cart. Expected.

Today I walked by on the way into the library and overheard that hot dogs cost $3 and he only takes cash. Then, on the way out I was wondering how much he makes from his little cart. Even if he has a whole dollar in costs per hot dog (which I highly doubt) he is making $2 per dog. I have no idea how many he sells each day, but I did think... if he was making good money he would have hired someone to run his cart for him. So it must not be that good.

Ok, so I went to the first round of Math. I've never sat in on this class before. It was kinda weird. It was my class... same teacher, same material... but it was filled with strange faces and inside jokes I didn't get. Anyways, so the girl sitting next to me turns around and asks the girl behind her "So, how did it go?"

The other girl starts talking about an interview she had with the hot dog guy! Seriously! I couldn't believe it. Turns out the hot dog guy makes $600 a day with his little stand. I don't know if that is sales, or profit, but either way... a killer gig. Just as I suspected.

Sherlock

Our across the street neighbor and their neighbor had their cars broken into the night before last. My across the street neighbor had her gym bag stolen and her neighbor had the window broken of her car and her purse was stolen. Sucks. The cameras on our house do actually have a view of their houses so I said I would see what I could see. Which isn't much since it was still dark out when the break-ins occurred. We can see them happen but the quality of the tapes is so bad that it's not really helpful.

First off, I don't know if I have ever really explained my neighborhood but I live on a cul-de-sac that has a grassy area in the middle. Starting from the left is a big area with landscaping rocks and some utility boxes, this is also the bus stop. Then my across the street neighbor who had their car broken into, then their neighbor, then 4 houses, then the idiots, then two houses, then us on the edge of the cul-de-sac.

On the tapes you can see see a white figure come from off screen on the left (the rocks) and walk towards my across-the-street-neighbor's house. He starts to walk by and then turns and goes up to her passenger side and looks in the windows. Then goes to the back and lifts her tailgate and steals her gym bag. Then he walks off camera on the right. He is gone for a few mintues and then comes walking through the grassy middle with the gym bag and walks just off camera on the left bottom. He immediately comes back into view on the left top without the bag. I assume that he put the bag down behind the utility box that is right there and then went to grab a big river rock to break the window. He then walks across and off camera on the right. He's gone for a few mintues and then walks back across and off camera again. Almost immediately on another camera we see a car coming down the street. It's a car that clearly doesn't live in this neighborhood. You can tell the driver is lost in our maze of cul-de-sacs. They drive in one cul-de-sac, drive around it, pull in to the next one and then back out, then drive into ours, drive around the whole thing, once having to back up because they drive in someone's driveway on accident, and then leave the cul-de-sac and drive off camera.

Strange. But it was fun playing detective for a couple of hours. The whole thing makes me want to invest in some better cameras and get some more of them. I wish I could see if that car picks up the theif.

Puzzled

Connor has found puzzles. We bought a 25 piece Mickey Mouse puzzle at the dollar store before we left for Disneyland. Thought it might keep the kids busy in the hotel room for a few minutes. Luckily we forgot about it because I see now that it would have caused a nuclear meltdown for everyone involved.

Puzzles are Maddy's thing. She has been whipping 25 piece puzzles together since she was 2. She was impressive with them, really. Connor has different interests. He has never shown any interest in any of the things Maddy liked to do as a toddler, puzzles included.

However, Larry got out the new Mickey puzzle for him yesterday morning and the two of them sat down and put it together. Connor was frustrated with it. Doing typical boyish things like forcing pieces together and then throwing them across the room. But he was also determined to get it. Him and Larry did the puzzle together several times, then him and I did it once. Then we were both tired of it and Connor worked for the rest of the day on it by himself. Seriously, he probably spent a good 5 hours working on this puzzle.

He did finally get it though! He isn't one to give up. He KNOWS he has the ability and he just can't let it go until he figures it out. He is obsessive about it. We went out while he was working on it and the second we walked back in the house he yelled "My Puzzle!" and went running over to the table. That determination pays off most of the time. But I can see that if Maddy had been around she would have wanted to do it for him... you know, to "help"... and Connor would have flipped out.

Disneyland

We are back from Disneyland. I know I didn't mention it on here. We really weren't sure if we were even going til like two weeks before we left. Which is totally unlike us. Normally we plan this stuff like a year in advance... but we are doing lots of things lately that aren't like us. I don't know what's going on. Too busy I think. We are too busy to be ourselves.

But it was fun. It was a different type of trip than we usually have. Normally I'm all amped up for the trip and while we are there I'm trying to get the kids (and me) to see everything. Go on every ride, see every character. Like our lives depend on it. But on this trip I just wasn't that way. I just wanted to sit down! The whole trip was more low key than normal. So we didn't do all the things we normally do. But we had fun. It was all decorated for Halloween, which was cool to see. We got to eat at the Blue Bayou which I've always wanted to do. It's the restaurant inside the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. That was cool. And I've finally admitted that I don't really like "It's a small world". Afterall.

We also went to the beach. I haven't been to the beach in like 7 years. Crazy! That was nice. We had an extra day in California and we just kinda hung around and rested. I needed a vacation from my vacation.

It was Maddy's birthday while we were there. 8! I can't believe it. We got her the Monsters vs. Aliens movie, Bendaroos, Pixos, and a big Costco size pack of Littlest Pet Shop toys. Big hits all around. It was also our 5 year wedding anniversary on Friday. We did spend the whole thing driving home from California, but hey... we were together. So it could be worse. We spent our anniversary last year driving home from the Grand Canyon. Seems to be a trend.

New hair

Hello. Larry brought up the fact that I haven't posted anything in like 10 days and my last post was me freaking out. I'm not still freaking out... if you were worried about me. I'm good.

I finished my Math project and that relived a huge amount of stress. I felt so light and airy after that. Like I had won some homework award.

I went to the very ritzy hair salon last night. I'm lookin' fine, let me tell you. I haven't been there in two years and my regular lady there had two babies since the last time I saw her! Two babies! How the heck? Anyways, I had to pinky swear that I would go more often. I plan to. I can't commit to every six weeks like they want because, well... that's insane. But I did promise to come back in 6 months. :) It fits in with my new years resolution to be more stylish. Yeah, I'm still on that.

Oh! I forgot to mention the whole reason I brought it up. Dixie Carter from Designing Women was at the salon too. I didn't know it til after she left, but still... I felt fancy. I told you it was a ritzy place. It has golden frames around the mirrors, strategically placed fake pillars, B-list celebrities... and me.

I come home with my new hair and Connor wouldn't leave it be. "Oh, I love your haircut, Mommy." "Such a nice haircut, Mommy." "You look so pretty, Mommy." Seriously, he must have told me 10 times that he liked my hair. Then Larry said he kept bringing it up while Larry was putting him to bed. I think he's afraid Connor is going to grow up to be a hairdresser. hehe. I wouldn't mind... I would be his first customer everyday. :)~

Breakdown

I've had several nervous breakdowns in my life. Some big, some little. But they all start the exact same way. They all start with me thinking "It's cool. I got this. I know things are kinda stressful right now, but look how well I'm handling it. I'm fiiiiinnne. " And then within minutes I'm a sobbing disaster.

Today I was sitting at a red light thinking those famous last words. I turned onto the freeway and about a mile later I missed my exit. That was it. That was the last straw. The tears started and 14 hours later they haven't stopped.

While you read this story keep in mind that I am either crying, or hold back tears this ENTIRE time.

I got to school, I wasn't late but I was right on time. I walk in to drop Connor off at preschool and this lady stops me to try to get me to register for their new daily sign in thing they got going. I have to do it eventually but honestly right then I didn't have time. She asks if I can do it when I come pick up Connor. I tell her I can't. (I really couldn't, I'll get to that in a second.) "It only takes 5 minutes." (Which I know is a lie because they said it takes 15 minutes to register when they sent the paper home last week and I'm not going to let her get me into that trap.) I tell her I really can't today. I promise to do it on Monday and jet on out of there.

So I go to class. My first class was normal. Then I went to Math. We started our group projects today. Click here for my opinions on group projects. For the project I need to buy a program from the Math department. I had planned on getting it today. For weeks my teacher has been saying how you can pick it up in the Math department for $10. Today he mentions that first they give you a code. Then you put that code into a website. You pay the $10 and then you get another code. Then you take that second code to the keepers of necessary program and they give it to you. CRAP! So I call Larry to make sure he will be near a computer after class so that he can enter this secret code into this website and give me the second secret code so I can get my damn program today. (Silly me thought I could just walk in a buy it. Ha! I forgot who I was dealing with.)

So after class I go to get code #1. Of course there is no code #1. You just go online and pay and then bring in the receipt. God Damn it!! So Larry has been waiting by a computer for 30 minutes for no reason. Instead he could be at school with my receipt right this very second! So I call him back with the website they gave me so he can do his thing.

It doesn't work. He tries Googling it. Nothing. So I go back to the Math Gods and tell them their website doesn't work. This middle aged [censored] who probably can't even check her own email looks over the top of her half glasses at me and just shakes her head no. What the [censored] kind of response is that?! So I say it again. "This website doesn't work." pointing to the sheet of paper they have taped to the counter with half a roll of clear making tape. This time actual words came out of her mouth. "Someone was able to use it yesterday." Oh wow! Thank you so much. That solved all my problems!! It's ok Larry, someone was able to use it yesterday. We are saved! Someone was able to use it yesterday! Hooray! Is that person here? Maybe THEY can help me?

I have a very hard time with rude customer service people because I have been in customer service so long myself that I know ALL the buttons to push. I have to make it a point to say as little as possible.

So while I'm standing there glaring at her Larry is able to figure it out. There is supposed to be a slash at the end of the URL that they failed to write on their super helpful note. So I tell the old [censored] this and she just stares at me. So I say it again "There is supposed to be a slash at the end of this." Thinking that maybe she will... oh I don't know... try it herself. Or at the very least remember this tidbit for the next poor soul who is put through this torture.

During all of this code getting fun I'm getting and making calls for work. I literally have a phone in each hand saying things like "hold on"... switch phones... "did that work? no? ok. hold on"... switch phone... "I will find that out and call you right back."... switch phones... "you got it? yeah? ok. hold on"... switch phones... ect.

Don't forget... I'm crying the whole time.

So while I'm waiting for Larry to come with my receipt I decide I should probably go pick up Connor since I'm way late. I walk in and immediately get ambushed by Register-For-The-New-Sign-In-Thing lady. I figure I might as well. I now have time, believe it or not. I literally have to sign my name 17 times during it. No joke. But I'm now registered on their high-tech device that will secure the saftey of my child. Either that or I just bought a house, I can't be sure.

I get and then make another set of work phone calls.

Finally, I'm ready to pick up Connor... a full 25 minutes late. Which is saying a lot since my class is within site of the daycare. I go and get the van, fight through insane bumper to bumper traffic in the parking lot, and get to our designated meeting spot and wait for Larry.

Larry shows up with what is the most ridiculous "receipt" I have ever seen. It basically just says my name and the name of the program. The website never even asked him to pay the $10. Which at this point I'm not sure what to believe. Nothing else anyone has told me about this adventure has been right, so who knows. Maybe it's free.

But just seeing him make me want to fall into his arms and never let go. I can't hug him or I will really lose it. All I want on this whole earth is to go home with him.

I go to park Larry's car. I do a few switch backs looking for a spot and my phone rings. It's Larry. He needs something out of his car. ARG. So I go back to the meeting place and wait for him. We meet again. He gets what he needs and return to looking for a non existent parking spot.

Finally, I take my paper back to new best friend. But first I find a seat in the air conditioning and take a few deep breaths. When I think I have pulled myself together enough to face her I go around the corner. She sees me, buries herself in her keyboard, and calls some guy to come help me. He takes my paper and furrows his brow. I'm just about to lose it when he says that I need to go to the cashier's office to pay. I curse everything at the thought, but I'm happy to be over one hurdle so I just sigh and begin the quarter mile hike to the cashier's office.

I pay. That was not eventful, thankfully.

The Math department guy accepts my papers! As he opened the door of wonders angels began to sing. A golden light poured from the closet and two doves flew past him and out in the room. It was glorious! He made sure to point out he magical "key code" inscribed on the fine paper that enveloped the program that is so special, so valuable that only the most hearty souls ever have it bestowed upon them.

I walk out with my prize. But the glory doesn't last long because in my frustration I have NO CLUE where I parked so I walk around the hot parking lot for 10 minutes looking like a fool. The van is easy to spot since there are very few minivans in a college parking lot. But a white 4 door sedan is practically impossible to see until you're on top of it.

On the ground next to the car was a full sized piece of corn on the cob on a stick. Think about that. Someone was eating corn on the cob on the way to school. I giggled through my tears.

[I finished the above post at 1:17 am. Before I could even hit "publish" Connor started screaming from his bed. Jumped up and went to his room to find him covered in puke and, upon further investigation, diaherra. I can't make this stuff up people! I wanted to leave you with an a funny corn on the cob image. But the day refused to end that way. Good night!]

The advice of strangers

Hello! This week flew by like the neighbors past my house. (Like a blur.)

Connor pooped his pants at school on Monday. Poor guy. Here's the kicker though. They aren't allowed to wipe his butt. Which of course, being 3, he can't really wipe it either. So where does that leave us? With a poopy butt. I felt so bad.

On Wed or Thurs of last week he had pooped at school (in the potty) and they didn't help him wipe. He was covered in poop when he got home. I asked him if he had asked for help to wipe. He said he hadn't. So the next day I told them that someone needs to help him if he poops and they told me that they don't wipe the kids.

They said "You need to be working on it at home with him... it's part of potty training." But I heard "You have really failed at potty training him if he can't wipe himself. We told you that he needed to be fully trained. If he comes home covered in poop it's all your fault."

I really do understand why they have decided not to wipe the kids. But other than being a sad commentary on society, it's gross. Connor had walked around for several hours covered in poop. I mean, come on. Why is that ok?

So I think that experience is what caused him to poop his pants 4 days later. I'm sure he was trying to wait til he got home. And we have been working with him at home. I'm trying to redeem myself.

This whole poop situation was hot on the heels of being chastised at the dentist for allowing Maddy to brush her teeth alone. Alone! I'm a terrible person, I know. I took her for a cleaning and they said "You should still be brushing her teeth for her. We recommend the parents help until the child can write their name in cursive, legibly." But I heard "You are such a lazy and inattentive parent. What the heck do you do all day? Obviously, a 7 year old isn't able to brush her own teeth. All her teeth are going to rot and it will be all your fault."

So, I am supposed to allow my 3 year old to wipe himself and brush my 7 year old's teeth. Ok, yeah, that's logical. How about I just keep doing what I'm doing and they can deal with it? Yeah, that sounds better. I think I'll do that.

I worked out four times this week. I decided that I needed to put this in a higher priority slot. It was behind homework which wasn't working out. (haha.. get it?) Homework is never done. I have gained 2 pounds in 4 weeks. blah. So there you go. Homework or no homework... the elliptical machine calls. I also haven't been sleeping as well, working out helps that. I easily fall asleep and stay asleep when I've worked out that day. And I really don't mind doing it. The hardest part is getting up off the couch and going up stairs. Once I'm up there I don't mind doing it.

The weather is starting to get nice. We went to the park yesterday and played some baseball. Connor can hit! And Maddy is still calling her glove her mitten. Which continues to crack me up. So we found the shade of a big tree and were playing nicely. These two kids come by on their bikes and stop to watch. Not off to the side, mind you. Practically between Larry (pitching) and Connor (hitting). They ask to play. I tell them no. So they ride around between us all on their bikes and sit on the grass like two feet away from me. The proceed to talk loudly to each other. Arguing about who gave who gum. Very annoying. So I casually suggest that they go on ahead and do whatever they were planning to do today. "Oh, it's ok... we didn't have anything to do." oh... ok, good. Just stay here and annoy the heck out of me then. So I suggest we move over to the other big patch of shade. But just then the wind came up and we could see a dust storm moving in... so we went to Subway instead.

Brownies

Maddy started girl scouts on Monday. Well, she is a Brownie, technically. So cute. I was a Brownie once. I never really got into the girl scout thing myself. I didn't understand the whole badge situation. It just didn't make much sense to me. I was supposed to get badges? For what? Just to wear around on this weird brown sash? No thanks, I'll just watch TV.

But Maddy on the other hand. I think this is something Maddy can get into. Seems like her kind of thing. I think she will be very proud of her badges, and the whole ceremony of it all.

I was asking her if she wanted to do it and explaining kind of what I thought it would be like.
"You will go to your troop leaders house with a bunch of other girls. You will do activities and..."
"I LOVE ACTIVITIES!!"

She might not know what these activities are... but she's for them. So signed her up. They meet every other week and then like once a month there is a Saturday activity. Good stuff too, like Skateland and the Zoo. I think she is going to love this.

Because breathing is important

I'm sure it's typical... but Maddy has a habit of slowly not doing the things she is supposed to do if I stop asking about it.

For example, brushing her teeth. She does fine if every single day I say "Did you brush your teeth?" The answer is yes. Since the answer is always yes I don't feel the need to ask her every day. I think she is doing it. I walk around with my smug assumption that I have impressed upon her the benefits of tooth brushing and that a 7 year old is capable of staying in the habits I've helped her establish.

I'm a fool.

The desire to quietly disobey me is more ingrained then I could ever have imagined. This finally became apparent when I noticed I haven't refilled her asthma medicine in quite awhile. You know... the medicine she needs in order to breathe. It's always during the fall that she has her big annual asthma attack and we spend a long sleepless night in Urgent Care. So with September upon us I've been paying extra attention to her breathing, and therefore to her medicine intake.

I noticed a disturbing trend. She's not taking it. I mean, she's taking it because sometimes I would ask her. Maybe once a day, or once every other day.

"Did you take your medicine?"
"oh I forgot!" and then she would run up and take it.

I didn't realize that this was the only time she was taking it. I don't understand why she decided to stop taking it. It's quick, literally two inhales twice a day. It doesn't taste bad. It doesn't make her feel weird. And the benefits are great.... being able to breathe. There is NO reason not to take it.

Which means she would rather pull one over on me than breathe. And that, my friends,... is what chills me to the bones.

Love thy neighbor

We called the cops on our neighbors again. I hate them... have I mentioned that?

If you don't think I have then click here. Cause you will see that I most certainty have!

Anyways yesterday afternoon at 3:10, I was getting ready to leave when I saw my neighbor start to pull in across the street. This is the guy who can't seem to leave or arrive without driving in our yard. So I was was watching. He pulled (what seemed to me but then was later disputed on the video tapes) about half way into our driveway. That pissed me off... so I go outside.

"Could you please not drive on our property?"
no response
"Your tires were all the way up here" motioning to how far I saw him pull up "There is no reason for that."
"So. Get over it."

Well, sir, I dont' have to get over it. I have Google on my side. So I started looking up the trespassing laws in Arizona. Turns out that "Knowingly entering... any real property after a reasonable request to leave by the owner..." is called criminal trespassing in the third degree. It's a misdemeanor. A third class misdemeanor, which I have to assume is the absolute lowest possible crime in the American justice system... but it's still a crime.

So we called the cops. The cop watched the video and said that he didn't pull in far enough to be able to prove that he did it "knowingly". I haven't seen the video but Larry said that he didn't pull in as far as we had thought from our angle downstairs. Fine. Whatever.

So I don't know. I'm sure I can get video of him pulling all the way into our driveway but it will have to be a time when the van isn't parked there. And then... I don't know. Is it worth pursuing? I just want him to stop doing it. Maybe seeing the cops at our house shortly after our little interaction will leave him chilly... and he will just stop on his own. Doubtful... but I can dream.

WTF Costco?

A few weeks ago we were at Costco and noticed that there were only two packages of Sweet Baby Ray's left. Since it is the worlds best barbecue sauce and I didn't like the look of this situation I went ahead and bought both packs. (That's four huge bottles in total.) I figured that would be enough to hold me over until Costco realized their grave mistake and ordered some more.

Nothing yet.

Then Friday I was innocently poking around over by the fresh salsa and over heard another customer ask a Costco guy where the Peach Mango Salsa was. To which he responded that they weren't going to carry it any more. This, people, is a travesty. Their Peach Mango Salsa was the best! I'm crushed that it's gone. I totally butted into their conversation with an "but it was sooooo good!" and then the other customer and I looked at each other and just shrugged our shoulders. I did tell him of another salsa that is pretty good... my second favorite. He grabbed a jar, I hope I saved the day for him.

But my disappointment didn't end there. When I got over to the jelly I found the Knott's Berry Farm strawberry preserves that I have been making sandwiches with for the past 3 years has been replaced by Wall's Berry Farm raspberry jam. I got some, we'll try it... but honestly, where is the Knott's Berry Farm stuff?

What is going on over there? What crazy good thing are they going to stop carrying next? Come on Costco... get it together!

He is so cute!

I had about 15 minutes to kill before class today so I sat in on Connor's class for a bit. They were sitting on the "circle rug" and the teacher was going around the room pointing out each area of the class room.

"This is the writing table. You can use the markers and make a book." She said holding up some construction paper that had been folded and stapled into a book. Then she moved to the next area, "And this is the science table" and she held up some test tube looking things with stuff inside. "And this is the housekeeping area where you can play dress up or play in the kitchen."

Connor was watching all of this with extreme interest. Then leaned over to the little girl sitting next to him and said "This is amazing!"

School

I'm afraid to bring it up because I might jinx myself, but I've managed not to eat out on school days. Which is 4 days a week by the way. Not even an iced tea. This is money saving stuff right here people. I was going to say it was also calorie saving... but then I would have to ignore the piece of chocolate cake I eat immediately upon walking in the door after school.

Today on the way to school I accidentally drove on the rumble strip for a second. I thought it was my exit... it wasn't. Anyways, Connor said "Hey mom?! I think the bye-byes (that's what he calls the van) just FARTED!!!" and then he laughed a real genuine laugh. Not the fake HA HA laugh we usually get... a sweet bubbly giggle. It was so cute... he's such a boy!

I have to leave a full 30 minutes earlier than I should to get to school because it takes FOREVER to find a parking spot. On Thursday I circled around for 25 minutes looking for a spot. Jeeze. I was getting so frustrated. Connor kept saying "Mommy, just park the car right here! We are going around in circles." Yeah... I know. Whether it's because of the high unemployment rate and people are using this time to take some classes, or because people can't afford ASU so they are coming to community college, or... as I heard today... that people are taking a class at MCC and then taking public transit over to ASU so they don't have to pay for parking over there (grrr) it sucks. If I didn't have Connor I would consider parking at the mall across the street and riding a bike over to class. But I'm stuck at the mercy of parking spaces... and I will go around and around and around looking for a precious spot.

Preschool

Well, we survived our first day. This morning was a little tough because he was ready to go and we had about 3 hours to kill before it was time to leave. Luckily, there was a marathon of Special Agent Oso (Connor's favorite show) on so that saved me.

We still got there a full 30 minutes early because I wasn't sure how long it was going to take me to drive there, or find a parking spot, or say good bye to Connor, or find my class. Turns out everything went perfectly so I found a shady spot outside my class and talked to Larry on the phone.

As far as leaving Connor at school... that went as expected. I hung out with him in his class for about 5 minutes and then I said "Ok, It's for me to go to my own school." He started to cry a little bit and said that he wanted to come with me. I said "No, you are going to stay here with your teachers and all your new friends. I'll be right back." He thought that was fine and that he wanted to play with the trains. I got a hug and a kiss and then off he went. When I left he was choo chooing along with another little boy.

When I went to pick him up they had just come in from playing outside. He was just as any little boy should be... a big sandy sweat ball. lol. His hair was soaked with sweat and his hands and legs had sand stuck to them all over. He didn't want to leave.

I think tomorrow should be fine.

The hand of milk and honey

The other day I was putting Connor down for a nap and he grabbed my hand and smelled it. He then told me that I smell like milk and honey. I laughed and wondered where he learned that saying. I made a mental note to ask Larry about it but quickly forgot about the whole incident.

Then last night Larry told me that Connor was upset because he wouldn't let him wash his hands before bed (Connor had just gotten out of his bath) because his hands didn't smell like milk and honey. I asked Larry what was up with that and told him the story of nap time. Larry said the hand soap in the kids bathroom is milk and honey scent. But the kicker is that neither of us told Connor that. Was Connor able to figure that out just by smell alone?

Milk and honey? Really? I could see if it was strawberry, or orange, or even watermelon. But milk and honey? That's crazy. Someone MUST have told him. I mean, come on.


On a totally unrelated topic:

I got my nails done the other day. As the lady is painting my nails she asks me if I wanted to get my brows done. "Wan Brow!?!" I said "No, I'm fine." and then she stopped painting and looked up at me over the top of her glasses. haha. I now have new brows.

First day of school... again and again.

Connor starts preschool tomorrow... and he couldn't be more excited about it. We went on Thursday to meet the teachers and he got a good look around the class room. He went straight for the piano and had to be dragged away to check out the rest of the room. He was also interested in the fish tank and the slide. Now we are in full count down mode until he can "finish playing the piano and looking at the fishes and going down the slide" (checking off his fingers as he explains).

On Friday I went and got him a backpack. It has all the Marvel superheros on it. He is very proud of it. He put it on at the store and basically hasn't taken it off. It's adorable!

It's also my first day of school tomorrow. Life is about to be very different. Going to school 4 days a week is going to be a drastic change to our routines. Two days a week I don't have to be there till noon, so that is going to be a struggle. In a perfect world I would like to leave the house around 9:30 or 10:00, so I don't know what we are going to do to kill the extra time. We will have to figure something out.

We have homework

Finally. I've been waiting for two years and one week for Maddy to get some regular homework. We finally have some. She has to read for 20 minutes, study her math flash cards, and work on her spelling words.

She hates it.

I sent her upstairs when she got home to work on her spelling words while I cut out the gazillion math flash cards. She came down like 15 minutes later and I thought she was done. Nope. She hadn't even started, she just came down to tell me that she doesn't want to do it.

Too bad.

If anything is going to make her not like school it's homework. Homework and math. I'm making a prediction that she will struggle with math. We have done the addition flash cards every night for a year now and haven't made any progress. It's like she is seeing every problem for the very first time. We do them every night. Every night. And yet, it doesn't sink in. She can't see that if 3+4=7 that it then makes sense that 3+5=8. That doesn't compute. 3+5 is a completely new equation with no relationship to 3+4 whatsoever.

I see math tutors in our future.

But the spelling words are a totally different story. I usually go over them one time with her and she's good. Not that she gets a 100% on every test, she doesn't. She makes a mistake here or there, but she knows how to spell the word when I ask her and she isn't over thinking it.

Second Grade

Well, the first day of school has come and gone with surprisingly little fanfare. Monday was the first day. Sunday night she came home from Shaun's and cried and cried and cried. I guess she was just nervous. Seriously she would not stop crying. He dropped her off at 5:00 and by 6:30 I had put her to bed. She was a disaster.

But she woke up ready to go and, as I predicted, by the time she saw kids at the bus stop she had forgotten all about being nervous.

All of her predictions in her letter came true. She is loving school. LOVING IT!

I on the other hand am having a hard time creating a new routine for us. Today was movie day and there was no summer movie. Thursday is library day. I am going to the library tomorrow to return the last stack of books... but then what. Normally we go get pizza after the library but I got pizza today out of sheer boredom and lack of planning. So I don't know...

Savior

Connor has a favorite shirt. It is a beige button up shirt with a collar. On the front pocket it has a blue lizard logo on it and then that same lizard full size on the back. It's his lizard shirt, and he loves it.

He goes lizard hunting in the back yard when he wears that shirt. He stands over by the tree where all the lizards live and shades his eyes with his hand, like he is looking far off into the distance, and looks for lizards.

So about two weeks ago I'm sitting in the living room and he comes racing in.

"Mommy! I found a little lizard!"
"Oh, really? That's cool." I say not really believing him because he was supposed to be drinking his milk in the kitchen. So I don't see how he found a lizard.
"Yeah! Come see!" He's very insistent and he takes my hand and pulls me into the kitchen. As we walk he says, "I was sitting in my green chair and then I looked over and I found a little lizard!"

We get to the kitchen and he points to a spot on the floor... and sure enough, there is a little lizard sitting there on the floor. See how little it was? Compare his size to the size of the grout line. It's just a tiny little thing.

It was perfectly still. I wasn't even sure it was alive but I tapped on the wall and it moved it's head ever so slightly to get a better listen. I wasn't sure what to do. I had no intention of killing it. Lizards eat crickets. We love lizards. So I just left him alone. It was time for us to go out anyways, so we left. When we came back he was gone.

I was telling this story to Larry and he said that he will probably die in the house. Which then I felt bad. I should have tried to catch him and put him outside. I should have put a glass over the top of him and then slid a piece of paper underneath. Then carefully carry the whole thing outside. That's what I should have done.

Well, a few days later I got my chance. I saw him on the blinds in the kitchen. He had one little hand on the window... like he was mourning the outside. Now that I had a plan, I knew what to do. I got my glass and tried to get him off the blinds so that I could catch him. It wasn't easy. I had to give the blinds a pretty good wiggle to get him to move. Then he fell off the window sill trying to get away from me and I was worried he was hurt. But he seemed fine as he scurried away. I chased him around the kitchen trying to get my glass down in front of him, but at the same time, not squish him. Somehow I managed to do it. He went into his frozen scared lizard state and I was able to get the paper under him and get him outside without further incident. I took him over to the tree where they all seem to hang out. As soon as I took the glass off he ran away into the bushes.

Ever since then the lizards seem more friendly around me. One even came and got a drink right in front of me while I was watering the trees. I think they know I'm lizard friendly. :)

The end of summer vacation

One week left of summer vacation. ONE WEEK! Crazy. Pretty much my only goal of the summer was to get Maddy's room fixed up. Which I did. So can we call it a success? Possibly... But I know my goals weren't very high. Two months to clean one room isn't exactly shooting for the moon.

We also bought and ate tons of strawberries. I learned how to make Strawberry Bread. Which is delish. And we went swimming several times. So that is good. As the kids get older they are more fun to take to the pool.

Maddy has been kind of swimming... in a all systems go, way too much effort for the amount of propulsion kind of way. But it makes me think she is ready to really get something out of swimming lessons. I've looked up some places and there is a place not too far from here that gives lessons year round for only a slightly outrageous amount of money. I think it would be a good idea. Does that mean we will do it? I haven't fully decided yet.

We also went to all 10 weeks of the summer movie program. I learned that it's better to skip the big giant drinks and just bring lolipops for the kids. It really saves lots of bathroom trips during the movie. Of course I didn't figure this out until week 10. But now I know for next year. (Next year when I'm talking about how fun the movies are going to be over the summer please remind me of this little tip. Thanks.)

We also had a good library schedule going for the last few weeks. This is something I need to start earlier in the summer. I had been nervous about the library because before when I used to go there Connor was so little and he would get lost in the bookcases. But once I got my nerve up and went I found out it's not so bad. He's bigger now and doesn't get lost as easily. I only lost him once in the 3 or 4 times we went. And that was because he was very concerned about a just-learned-how-to-walk baby that was wandering away from his daddy. It was super cute. Connor stayed right with the baby and was all worried about the fact that it was walking away and no one seemed to watching him.

So one week from today Maddy will get on the bus and go to second grade. Wow. Who's life am I living? Cause I certainly don't have a second grader!

There goes the neighborhood... part two

So yesterday we talked about the drama with our next door neighbor... aka "the dish guy". Unfortunately, he is not even our least favorite neighbor. If you read this blog with any regularity then you already know that. If you don't read it regularly and you want to catch up on our actual least favorite neighbors, you can check out the following posts:

Here is when their pit bull was aggressive towards Larry
Here is when they hit Larry's car (allegedly)
Here is when they hit the van

And I didn't even write about things like when they were driving their 4 wheelers back and forth in front of our house. Or when they had an unsecured trailer (for said 4 wheelers) parked in front of our house for two months. Or how they knock over our trash cans. Or drive in our driveway and on our grass every single day.

We have dubbed them "the truck house" if we are talking about them in general, or "the truck guy" if we are talking about the driver of the white truck.

Ever since they hit the van we have been doing our best to block the parking spots across the street from our house so that the big truck can't park there. We do no feel comfortable with it parked across the street from our house since it isn't safe and already has cost us quite a bit of money and drama.

A normal person would understand this. But apparently "the truck house" doesn't. Because not only does the truck guy continue to park there every chance he gets, the other members of "the truck house" also park in such a way as to block the spaces. They even have "the dish guy" parking over there to block the spaces. Which totally cracks me up because I guess they are trying to keep us from parking over there. Which is funny because I don't WANT to park over there. I'm only doing it to keep the dangerous truck away from my house. They think they are being mean to us... but really they are just helping us. I pretend to be mad just so they will keep doing it.

But even with half the cul-de-sac trying to keep those spots blocked the white truck does manage to park there on occasion. Tuesday night at about 4:30 pm he managed to get a spot. But this time he left the truck running. He has a freezer in the back of the truck. I'm assuming he had stuff in the freezer that he was trying to keep frozen. I don't know that for fact, but it's the only thing that makes sense.

It was still sitting out there running at 9:45 when I was getting ready to go to bed. Now I want to make clear that it is not parked very far from my house at all. You might read "across the street" and think it's kinda far. It's not. I'm terrible at guessing distances but I would say it's about 30 feet from the front of my house to the back of the truck.

When I woke up in the morning it was still over there and running! I couldn't believe it. I can't believe he would leave his truck running in front of my house all night! Anyways, not surprisingly, I also had a killer headache. I almost called the cops right then, but I had to leave and I wanted to be around when they showed up so I decided to call when I got back.

I left and within 15 minutes my killer headache was completely gone. Coincidence?

When I got home the truck was gone. So I missed my chance to call the police. I did look up the law and you are only allowed to let your car idle for 5 minutes. Passenger buses are allowed to let the bus idle for 30 minutes to keep the air on for passenger comfort. That's it. So it is against the law to let your truck idle for 20 hours.

It also didn't go unnoticed that my headache returned within 15 minutes of being home. But luckily it wasn't as bad as it had been when the truck was actually parked there emitting noxious fumes directly towards my house.

So now that he has damaged both our vehicles (one documented, one allegedly) and caused me to suffer from carbon monoxide poisoning (allegedly) I'm really doing my best to stop that truck from parking there. We parked both our cars over there and blocked all three spaces with them. We left them there and took the truck when we went out.

When we came home and there was a note on Larry's car but it didn't say who is was from. So we go inside and watch the video (cause we have our cameras up now) to see who left the note. Turns out it was "the dish guy's" baby mama and "the truck guy's" son. They pulled up (together in the same car), saw our cars, and then "the truck guy's" son came and knocked on the door. We weren't home so obviously we didn't answer the door. Then "the dish guy's" baby mama came and did a little dance for the camera and gave it the middle finger. (Must be a family trait.) Then "the truck guy's" son walked over and put something on Larry's car.

Despite our best efforts the white truck is parked across the street from my house currently. Which greatly annoys me.

There goes the neighborhood

About 6 months ago our next door neighbor had a satellite dish attached to the wall that separates our backyards. (This neighbor is now known as "The Dish Guy" or "The Satellite Dish Neighbor" in a formal setting.) The bad part was that the dish faced into our yard. So technically the dish was actually IN our yard. See the picture? That is taken from my back door. Isn't that pleasant?

We left a perfectly nice note on his door informing him of the problem and asking him to move it. No response. We then called the association and they "sent a letter". A big scary one I'm sure...Not. No response. So then we started putting things in front of the dish to both block the signal, and block the view of the dish. Which worked when we were home but when we were gone the neighbor would just move the stuff. So finally Larry just turned the dish around so it faced into their yard.

Keep in mind during all this time the neighbor was really mad at us and yelling swear words over the fence when he knew we were out there. Or honking as he drove past our house. Or putting his trash in our driveway (allegedly). Stuff like that. But never once did he come over and actually talk to us. Even when we were trying to be understanding about it. After the note he could have easily come over and apologized that they installed the dish there and offered a solution. He chose to ignore us instead.

So one day I hear some loud noises coming from next door. I look out the window and the dish is gone. I thought he was actually moving it. Then I look out about 5 minutes later and it's back. So I go outside. I can't see anything, I have no idea who is on the other side of the fence but I figure this is my chance to get this resolved.

"Excuse me. Please don't put that dish in my yard."
"It's not in your yard. It's in his yard."
This is when I realize that I'm actually talking to the dish guy. Not the neighbor.
"No." I say grabbing the part of the dish that is in our yard. "This right here is in MY yard."
I don't remember the exact details of the rest of the conversation since it was several months ago. We went back and forth several times but I wasn't backing down. Finally he agreed to move it. And it is now moved.

A reasonable person might think the war of neighbors was now over. I did. I mean, we had lived next door to each other for over a year without incident. I figured this would blow over.

It did not blow over. The drama has continued, on his part anyways. We have just been ignoring him completely. Then about two weeks ago Connor and I were walking from the van to the front door just as he was leaving. He honked and gave us the finger while he drove past our house. He did not realize until it was too late that Larry was standing in the doorway. For some reason he is scared of Larry. It's perfectly fine in his world to give the finger to a woman and a 3 year old child (as you drive away with the window rolled up). But he won't even show his face if Larry is around. It's kinda hilarious.

Larry has been looking for him ever since the middle finger incident. He just wants to talk to him, Larry has never threatened him in any way. But "the dish guy" is no where to be found. He hides. No joke. Just the other day he had parked across the street and was leaving just as Larry was coming back from getting the mail. He started across the street, noticed Larry, and then turned around and went back inside. He waited until Larry was in the house to leave.

I told you that whole story in order to tell you another story... but now this post is too long. So I'll finish tomorrow.

Stay tuned.

Note

I got the following note from Maddy earlier today...

I Love sckool. I will Love my Techer. I will like The room. I will make nuw frense. I will lern intresting stuf. I will Love my sockooll so much. I will have fun at sckooll vary.

Got that? At least she has a good attitude. And the sentence structure! Very nice.

Determined swimmers

If you know me then you know I like routines. Routines allow me go through my life with as little thought as possible. They allow me to keep up appearances. I would be a total disaster if I actually had to think about what I was going to do next. Instead routines keep things moving forward with very little brain power on my part.

On Fridays we go swimming. Today is Friday so I put "baby suits" on the kids this morning instead of regular clothes. They ate their breakfast at record speed and then fought over who was going to carry the fun noodle. (Only today the fight was about who was going to get to carry it, rather than the usual who was going to have to carry it. But whatever.) I took them in the backyard and sprayed them down with the spray on sunscreen and off we went. There is nothing I like better than walking through my neighborhood in my bathing suit all shiny and greasy from my sunscreen, but we got to the community pool only to find out that the water had been replaced with pea soup. Yeah... gross.

Tears fell.

We walk home, strip off our suits and get into regular clothes. Connor is crying and I'm feeling very out of sorts since it's Friday... we should be swimming. Now what am I going to do? I try to get past the fact that I skipped my shower because I was going to wait til after the pool and decide that we can head to Walmart and see if they have a blow up pool on clearance. We might still be able to swim.

Walmart does have a few blow up backyard pools left and, as I suspected, they are on clearance. Not super duper clearance, but clearance none the less. Since all the pools are in deceptively small boxes I have to look at the picture of the ultra happy family on the front to determine what is best for our ultra happy family. My choices were limited to a smiling and stylish mom sitting next to a pool with a baby in it, a smiling and stylish mom sitting next to a pool with a toddler in it, a smiling and stylish mom sitting next to a pool with three toddlers in it, and a smiling and stylish mom sitting IN a pool with two toddlers in it.

I quickly nixed the pools with the baby in it and the mom inside the pool. My kids need more than a six month old baby and I will not be joining in on the swimming fun if I have any say in the matter. I decided to go with the three toddler pool. It was more than I was hoping to pay, but I figure that a 7 year old and a 3 year old equal three toddlers. I don't know... this is the information I'm given to make the decision. What else can I do?

Ok, so we get home. I marvel at the tightness of the pool inside this teeny box. Honest to goodness... how do they get that in there? I find the holes to blow it up. The directions say to use a hand pump and that it will take 10-20 min to blow it up. hahaha. I get out the hand pump and let the kids go to town. 45 minutes later the pool is showing some minor signs of life but not even close to being able to hold water.

At the advice of my husband I dig around in our closet and find the pump for the air matteress. I had to make some adjustments and it wasn't perfect, but it worked. 10-20 minutes later we had our pool and after some comedic events we even got it outside.

Peanut butter and jelly sandwich break.

Baby suits back on. Fights over the fun noodle. Splashing. We are offically swimming. Then it started raining. No joke. Big, fat, summer time rain. There was no thunder so I let them keep swimming. I had to hide my book under a towel and knew we looked nothing like the picture on the box, but who cares.

Two is all I can handle

Larry has to work all weekend, which sucks. My only respite is that Maddy is at Shaun's this weekend. You would think having 2 two kids would be twice the work of one.. but you'd be wrong. It's three or four times as much work. Don't ask me why. I guess cause they get each other going.

When you only have one kid you don't have to deal with important issues like who needs to get into the van first. Or worry about who is touching who, or remember who had the orange cup last. You never call your child by the wrong name. And you don't have to introduce your own version of the fairness doctrine and ration out equal amounts of iCarly and Special Agent Oso.

When there is only one kid in the house you don't have to ask your 7 year old daughter why she is fighting with a 3 year old over a hot wheels car. You never have to listen to screaming through the bathroom door because one child is in there taking an exorbitant amount of time and singing, carrying on, and generally making the bathroom seem like the best place in the world.

No, it's only when there are two kids in the house that you must oversee who sits where on the couch or explain why one kids gets to stay up later than the other. Only when you have two kids do you have to pull over on the side of road and threaten to go home if they can't stop hitting each other. Only when you have two kids do you have to stagger bath times in such a way so that you can ensure every one gets hot water.

It's not an easy task... two kids. More than twice as hard as one kid. And this is exactly why we don't have three. If you were wondering.

I just wanna dance!

We were at the post office this morning and there was an older lady standing behind us in line. She asked Maddy how old she was...

"I'll be 8 in October."
"Oh, my niece's birthday is in October too. What day is your birthday?"
"The 14th."
"My niece's birthday is the day after Halloween."

True Story.


Ok, so Steve got married this weekend. OMG, the wedding was just perfect. Everything was just beautiful. So elegant and classy, but still fun and relaxed. The reception hall had dark wood walls and all the tables had tons of white candles in all different kinds of crystal vases. It was exactly how I would want my wedding reception to look... you know, if I had that kind of money to spend.

Connor shocked the heck out of me. He loves to dance. We dance around the house almost everyday. But I wasn't sure if he would dance at the wedding. I planned on trying to get him out there and dancing with him for a few songs. Haha. No need! Even before the reception got to the dancing part Connor was begging to get out there. As soon as he was allowed to dance, he danced. And didn't stop. Even when he was the only person on the dance floor he was out there. It was too cute. He danced until 9:45 when it was time to leave. He easily out danced everyone in the room.

And he actually stayed in a fairly good mood so we were able to stay til the end of the reception, which was unexpected. I'm so glad though because I didn't want to have to leave early.

Happy birthday

I hope everyone had a great holiday. Mine was ok. We went to the local Tea Party they had over here in Gilbert. It was my first political event ever. I was honestly surprised how many people were there. They are reporting that 2,000 people showed up. Which is impressive considering it was the holiday weekend and it was hot as all get out. We didn't stay til the end because Connor was getting hot. He gets so flushed, it looks like a we rubbed a strawberry on his cheeks.

Anyways, since the media tries to silence the conservative voice it's hard to find info about the Tea Parties. I was able to find a few videos from the Gilbert Tea Party. Here and here.

After that we went to my niece's birthday party. I think the 4th of July has to be the coolest birthday ever! I'm so jealous. :) So that was fun. They have a trampoline which the kids just loved. So I mostly sat out back and watched the kids go up and down.

And we have crossed a milestone in regards to the van situation. I called the insurance this morning and they accepted the estimate we had gotten over the weekend. $1,600. So they are sending over their portion and the van is currently in the shop. Poor little van. They also said the would sue the owner of the truck themselves. So that's a huge relief. If he pays them we will get our deductible back. They also said it won't make our premiums go up. Which was a pretty big concern of mine. So guess it's good news. I just want the van fixed at this point. We will work out the finances later. I am not going to hold my breath for reimbursement of our deductible. If we get a check someday I will be happy... otherwise I'm just going to move on. Nothing else can be done.

Unbelievable!

Ok, so a quick recap. I told you right here how we have very strong suspicions that our neighbor's hit Larry's car on Saturday night. I told you how we were so concerned with their driving skills that we ordered surveillance cameras for the front of our house because we knew they were going to damage our property, but the cameras haven't arrived. I told you how we have complained to the association every day for two weeks about the fact that they have this big panel truck parked across the street from our house and all the trouble it has caused us.

I told you all that.

So we have dealt with the fact that Larry is going to have a big side swipe mark on his car. It's beyond frustrating when your property gets damaged by someone who was being irresponsible and you can't do anything about it. But we know we can't change it so we had moved on. Honestly, we had.

Tonight after dinner we were sitting on the couch watching TV. The front window was open and the only thing I can see when I look out is that big white truck sitting across the street. I'm not really paying attention but it catches my eye when it starts to back up. I say casually to Larry "There he goes." I'm watching him back up... and back up faster... and back up faster. My breath starts to pull in as he gets closer and closer to the van. And then just when I think "I can't believe this, he is in our yard!" It comes to a very abrupt stop. Too abrupt. I say "He just hit the van!" although I didn't honestly believe that. I thought maybe he slammed on the brakes. But before the words are even out of my mouth Larry and I both jump off the couch and race to the front window. I still can't see the back of the van but the truck is just sitting there... awkwardly close to the van.

We both go rushing outside with the kids following closely behind us. Sure enough. There is a huge ugly caved in spot in the tailgate. Next stop... the truck's drivers door. No one is inside! So Larry starts over to the neighbor's house and I go inside for the camera. I'm taking pictures of the scene and Larry yells from the neighbor's house. "Ashley! Call the cops!"

So I do.

"Mesa police department."
"Yeah, my car was parked in my driveway and someone just backed into it."
"Someone drove into your driveway and hit your car?"
"Yeah."
"Your car was parked in your driveway and someone hit it?"
"Yeah."
"Someone hit your car while it was parked in your driveway?"
"YES!"

Surprisingly the guy who drives the truck actually came to the door and comes outside. In another amazing turn of events he actually admits that the parking brake must have let go which caused the truck to roll backwards and hit our van. In fact, it's happened before. "Oh well thank you so much for parking your huge ass, messed up, has a tendency to roll away at any moment, truck across the street from my house!" I'm actually thankful that my van was there to block the thing from coming through the wall. Jeeze. What happens next time?

He proceeds to spend the next 30 minutes telling us what a bad day HE is having!

So the cops arrive. Turns out that his unregistered truck is also uninsured. How nice. But the cops can't give him a ticket, or tow the truck... because he wasn't driving it at the time of the accident. No joke. In fact, the cop did us a huge favor by even taking a police report since they aren't supposed to if the accident happens on private property. Can you believe that?!

Dude hits our parked car with an unregistered, uninsured truck but the cops can't do anything about it at all! They aren't even supposed to take a report. Insane.

Oh, the heart melting part. The cop is there doing his thing and we are all kinda just standing around pissed off at each other. Connor goes inside and comes out with this tool box. OMG I just about died. He is so cute. He was going to fix it for us.

So I dont' really know where to go from here. I have to call the insurance tomorrow. I called today but it was 6:58 by the time everything got settled down and they close at 7:00. By the time I got through the automatic voice thingy it was after 7:00. Sigh. Which is just as well because if I had gotten anymore bad news today I would have lost it.

Our cameras should be here on Monday. Just in time to catch the cat pooping in our yard.